I wrote this at the end of the first year without my spouse. It is now a little over two years and things are more calm. I feel a sense of peace within myself. That’s not to say there is no more ambushes, but they hurt less.
It’s been a year since you left us.
A year that I was mostly mad.
Mad that you were a man
Mad that you were human
Mad that you were sick
Mad at myself for being mad
Mad that you left me before I was ready to let you go.
But as the tentative spring came, the Pelicans soaring overhead and the warm sun at my feet
I miss you, I love you. I know you are free.
I’m not mad anymore.
Just happy for the life and love we shared
Happy for the family and friends left behind.